"The Dharma of Grief: What Love Asks of Us"
with Lama Rod Owens
July 29 - August 2, 2026
A meditation retreat that weaves together periods of silence, meditation practice, dharma teachings, and compassionate community as we explore grief as an expression of love.
Grief is not separate from love. Grief is one of love’s most honest expressions.
To love anything deeply—a person, a place, a vision for the future, a community, even a version of ourselves—is to become vulnerable to loss. And yet many of us have never been taught how to hold that vulnerability with tenderness, wisdom, or courage. We’re taught to protect ourselves. To numb out. To move on quickly. To keep our hearts defended.
But what if grief is not a sign that something has gone wrong?
What if grief is evidence that we have loved?
As Lama Rod teaches, “Grief is a form of love.”
The Dharma of Grief: What Love Asks of Us is a 4-day retreat for young adults exploring what it means to love fully in a world where nothing lasts forever. Drawing from Buddhist wisdom, contemplative practice, somatic work, ritual, and honest community, Lama Rod will guide us into a radically different relationship with grief—not as something to fix, suppress, or transcend, but as a sacred dimension of being alive and in relationship.
This retreat is not only about grief. It is also about love.
What does it mean to love without clinging? To care deeply without shutting down in the face of pain? To stay open in a world marked by impermanence, heartbreak, injustice, and uncertainty? How do we cultivate the kind of love that is spacious enough to include sorrow, rather than collapsing beneath it?
In many spiritual spaces, grief can be subtly treated as something to move beyond—as though awakening means becoming untouched by heartbreak. But the dharma offers something far more intimate and honest. Impermanence guarantees loss. Love makes us vulnerable. To awaken is not to become numb—it is to deepen our capacity to remain present with the full truth of being human.
What the Retreat Will Be Like
This retreat combines meditation practice, periods of silence, dharma teachings, and opportunities for personal reflection and community connection.
Each day will include:
- Guided and silent sitting meditation
- Dharma talks and teachings from Lama Rod
- Optional small-group discussion and reflection Q&A with the teacher
- Personal time for rest, journaling, or walking in nature
Much of the retreat will be held in silence to support deeper presence and contemplation. Silence will be balanced with carefully facilitated opportunities to speak, connect, and explore grief together in community.
No prior meditation retreat experience is required. Beginners and experienced practitioners are equally welcome.
Lama Rod writes, “We have to learn how to metabolize grief instead of allowing grief to metabolize us.”
Together, we’ll explore how grief lives in the body, how unprocessed sorrow can harden into numbness, anger, exhaustion, or isolation—and how, when held with care, grief can become a doorway into deeper compassion, courage, tenderness, and connection.
This retreat is for anyone navigating loss, transition, heartbreak, uncertainty, ecological grief, collective sorrow, or the quiet ache of being human in difficult times. You do not need to be in the midst of acute bereavement to belong here. Grief has many faces.
Through meditation, teachings, embodiment, relational practice, and ritual, we’ll explore questions like:
- What does love ask of us in an impermanent world?
- How do we grieve without becoming consumed by grief?
- What if sorrow is not the opposite of love, but one of its expressions?
As Lama Rod reminds us, “There’s no liberation without actually leaning forward and looking at the things that we habitually run away from.”
This retreat is an invitation to do just that.
Noble Silence
This is a partially silent meditation retreat. Much of each day will be held in noble silence, with intentional periods for teachings, questions, and facilitated discussion.
When the whole group enters into Noble Silence we offer each other and ourselves the gift of being with our experience as it is. This practice supports the mind in settling. Noble Silence includes no unnecessary talking, including social courtesy like saying “good morning” or “excuse me”, no reading or writing unless a teacher specifically encourages you to do so, and no tech use.
Technology & Safety
You will be strongly encouraged to give up your phone for the week, you may choose to either hand it in to the retreat managers or keep your phone in your room turned off. Upon being accepted to this retreat, you will receive emergency phone numbers that we ask you to share with your loved ones so that you will not need to be monitoring your own messages. Dharma Gates retreat managers will be present throughout the entirety of the retreat to support the group. If at any point during the retreat you are feeling ill, are injured, or are in distress please speak with a retreat manager.
Who This Retreat Is For
This retreat is open to both newer and experienced meditators who feel called to deepen their practice in silence. Participants should feel reasonably comfortable with meditation and with spending time quietly with themselves.
Dharma Gates wholeheartedly welcomes people of all cultural, ethnic and racial backgrounds, sexual orientations, and gender identities. There will be gender neutral bathrooms available and we may be able to provide single rooms if that would make you more comfortable. Our aim is to make retreat practice accessible to all young people—if there’s something we can to do help you feel comfortable to attending, please do not hesitate to reach out to us!
Do I have to have meditation retreat experience?
No you do not. This is a great retreat for you if you have never sat a silent retreat before. We recommend that you begin a daily meditation practice in the weeks leading up to the retreat.
Location & Transportation
This retreat will be held on the beautiful land of Gray Bear Lodge in Hohenwald, Tennessee. It is about a 90 min drive from Nashville and 2.5 hours from Memphis.
Flights
If you are flying, the closest airport is Nashville Airport (BNA), about 1.5 hours from the retreat center.
Rideshares & Carpools
Because Gray Bear Lodge is somewhat remote, we strongly encourage carpooling whenever possible—both to reduce cost and environmental impact, and to help make the journey easier for everyone.
We will facilitate a participant rideshare spreadsheet / group coordination thread so folks can offer or request rides from Nashville Airport and nearby cities.
Important Note About Arrival
Please plan your travel so you can arrive within the designated check-in window and stay for the full retreat. Part of what makes retreat practice powerful is entering and leaving together as a container. Because the center is in a rural area, we recommend arriving prepared with anything you may need, as quick trips to stores may not be practical once the retreat begins.
Dana & Financial Information
Dharma Gates events are offered within the practice of Dana (दान), the Sanskrit/Pali word meaning generosity or giving. Rather than operating on a fee structure, we instead ask you to engage with us in a relationship of reciprocity, giving what feels aligned with your circumstances and values. If these experiences are precious to you, we invite you to donate in a way that reflects that. Doing so will breathe life into our efforts, helping us to continue creating beautiful, accessible practice opportunities for young people for years to come. Donation is possible upon registration, or by visiting this link.
To support participant commitment and attendance, there is a $50 registration deposit, which can be refunded up to 3 weeks in advance of a cancellation or upon completion of the full program.
What’s the deal with the age range?
Dharma Gates was founded because there are not enough spaces where young adults can practice meditation and the Dharma together. As such, we limit our retreats to folks age 18-35.
Do I have to be a Buddhist?
Definitely not! The teachings will be rooted in the Kagyu school of Tibetan Buddhism, and may include beliefs that will be new or foreign for some folks. Our invitation is to encounter the teachings with openness and curiosity and to maintain your own discernment about what resonates.
Food & Dietary Information
All meals will be nourishing vegan food prepared by the retreat kitchen team. If you have dietary restrictions, please indicate them in your registration form and we will do our best to accommodate them.
Registration
A unique offering from Gray Bear: The cost for this Retreat is donation based and open for all 18-35 years of age. Dharma Gates will be paying tuition and lodging for Participants who wish to attend.
Each person who wishes to attend will pay a $50 enrollment fee via Venmo link below to Gray Bear.
If you wish to attend, fill out form below & submit $50 enrollment deposit via Venmo link. Adam from Gray Bear will reach out to you with additional details including a few additional registration questions and provide an option to make a further donation if you choose.
Adam from Gray Bear will reach out to you with additional details including a few additional registration questions and provide an option to make a further donation if you choose.
About the Instructor
Lama Rod Owens
Considered one of the leaders of the next generation of Dharma teachers, Lama Rod Owens has a blend of formal Buddhist training and life experience that gives him a unique ability to understand, relate and engage with those around him in a way that’s spacious and sincere. His gentle, laid-back demeanor and willingness to bare his heart and soul makes others want to do the same. Even when seated in front of a room, he’s next to you, sharing his stories and struggles with an openness vulnerability and gentle humor that makes you genuinely feel good about who you are, with all your flaws and foibles, you’re lovable and deserving of happiness and joy. He invites you into the cross sections of his life as a Black, queer male, born and raised in the South, and heavily influenced by the church and its community. Lama Rod Owens was officially recognized by the Kagyu school of Tibetan Buddhism after receiving his teaching authorization from his root teacher the Venerable Lama Norlha Rinpoche (below) when he completed the traditional 3-year silent retreat program at Kagyu Thubten Chöling Monastery (KTC) outside of New York City. Lama Rod has a Master of Divinity degree…
Who Should Attend
This retreat is open to all. Meditation experience is helpful, but not required. 18-35 years of age. All Bodies Welcome!
Arrival Departure schedule
We'll begin with guests arriving Wednesday, between 3:00-5:30 pm. dinner is 6:00. Orientation & opening circle follow. Sunday finishes with closing circle followed by lunch. Checkout time is 1:00 PM. Gray Bear is a two hour drive from the Nashville airport, four hour drive from Crossville and 3.5 hours from Memphis. Please plan arrival/departure time with this in mind.